YOU CAN CALL ME HAWA
I'm a just an ordinary girl with a big dream; which I want to contribute something to the religion, society and nation. My story was not too pleased to be read by you because all of the immature content was part of me. But my mature part is quite enough to impress you and you will say, yes she's matured.
Currently a pharmacy student in University of Malaya, Malaysia.
30 December 20170 daisies
Hello guys. Hi. This is me, Hawa.
This is quite awkward for me as it had been a long time since i did this blogging, but yeah, lets have a little story. Read it until the end.
THIS IS MY CONFESSION.
Setiap kali aku teringat, how can he cheated on me when we actually just started to declare ourselves as a couple? How can he dated her when eventually, we decided to just stay as friend, just few days back?
I was in great pain, to discover (lepas stalk haha well that's my speciality) that he posted his picture dengan that girl on his instagram, his twitter. WALAUPUN aku tak follow dia, tapi yes, dia post gambar dia with that girl, in his car. Dia as a driver and she was beside her, taking the selfie. HAHAHAHAHAHA how pathetic I am even to have a dream like he will treat me like the special one, while he doesn't have any effort to meet me, and he doesn't even call me! Is that how a relationship work?
For your info, I rarely top up my phone, and I only do that if I want to go back home.
So, back to the story.
I was in pain, to see how can he forget me just in seconds after he met her Such a pathetic me, to crying inside the blank, knowing that I had been cheated.
Why make me so sad? Like really-really sad? Because he's the first one.
Imagine me, as a innocent, young and dumb and broke and who never involve in a any relationship & is that only what I got?
I don't ask for more. I never ask him to spend money for me. I didn't ask him to contact me every single day. And I still remember, how did he ignore me during our 5-DAYS-RELATIONSHIP WHICH I GUESS HE DOESN'T EVEN CALL THAT AS RELATIONSHIP, aite? And I guess thats the starting, when he met her and then, choose her.
And now, at the moment he come back, asking for my forgiveness, all I can say is yes, I can forgive you. But my trust to you is reducing, to 50%. And the moment you ask me to get back, aku terpaksa tolak.
I did give you my 2nd chance to know me well, tapi macam sama je. Nak dengar suara pun susah and that what i miss the most. Aku keliru. Yes, my feelings never change. The feeling is still there, but aku takut. It's such a risky. Percintaan tu macam satu perjudian. For me bila aku kalah, sakitnya tu Allah je yang tahu.
Nampak macam bodoh menangis sebab lelaki, but the pain is real. Bila kau betul-betul sayang, sakit itu, real.
Satu jelah aku nak cakap. Aku takkan terima if kau nak ajak couple TAPI kalau serious, kita habiskan dengan cara yang halal ((lepas habis belajar dah keje la weh aduh)). If you memang takde niat nak jadikan kita halal, then just go. Aku perempuan, dan aku berhak nak tentukan penghabisan sesebuah hubungan. Sebab yang halal itu walaupun ada onak durinya, tapi sekurang-kurangnya keputusan aku takkan berganjak dan inshaAllah hati pun takkan bergolak but Idon't know about you lah.
BTW my goal is to get married on 25+ sebab nak kerja dulu, nak senangkan mak ayah dulu, nak hantar diorang pegi haji dulu.
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